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ask-koki-kariya:

lastofthetimeladies:

im-a-timelord-you-ass:

lastofthetimeladies:

lastofthetimeladies:

MY MOM JUST ASKED ME WHAT I WANT MY CAKE TO BE FOR MY SPIDER-MAN THEMED BIRTHDAY PARTY AND I TOLD HER I WANT IT TO BE IN THE SHAPE OF ANDREW GARFIELD’S BUTT AND SHE WAS LIKE “SEND ME SOME PHOTOS I’LL SEE WHAT I CAN DO” OH MY GOD

image

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME

'Scuse me, but may I have a piece of that ass?

Do you know how many times I made that joke at my party

Do you

omfg

(via odins-one-eyed-fuck)

deckitout:

deckitout:

MY LESBIAN GRANDMAS BOUGHT EACH OTHER THE SAME FLANNEL SHIRT FROM MACYS FOR CHRISTMAS IM CRYING

UPDATE: THEY BOTH AGREED ON NOT GIVING EACH OTHER GIFTS

(via odins-one-eyed-fuck)

taxicar:

im like pre stress stressed like im stressed about the stress that i will b stressed about 4 school……………..education is magical 

(via ahciid)

Me:ah, yes. Home alone. I can do whatever I want!
Me:*turns TV up a couple notches*
Me:*watches YouTube videos without headphones*
Me:getting crazy up in here

allmymetaphors:

i accidentally showed some weakness earlier today it was disgusting i would not recommend it 

(via thrustyhoran)

nokiabae:

my biggest fear is I’m married & my husband says, “let’s cut sugar out of our diet” so I have to leave with the kids in the middle of the night

(via joshpeck)

kanyewestevil:

schools have stairs so you can throw yourselves down them

(Source: kanyewesticle, via ahciid)

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